Tubing, Coconut drinks, and Smores
by my-name-is-V
Summary: Our prediction of what is going to happen in the naruto manga,now that Sasuke wants to crush konoha."Suddenly, a blur of hot pink and giraffe passed by. WHAT THE HELL? WAS THAT NARUTO AND KABUTO TUBING IN THEIR FLOATIES?"CRACK.cw with cut.class.not.frogs


**This is what we predict is going to happen in the Naruto Manga now that Sasuke has killed Itachi….**

**Yeah its crack filled**

**So have fun**

**Sit back**

**And laugh to death.**

**:**

**09090909090909**

Sasuke was sitting on a rock in a dramatically high area, brooding. God, he needed chocolate. Dark chocolate, just like his heart and soul. He looked up at the moon, which was such a pretty circle. It was glowing yellow, just like Sasuke. He wanted to reach up and touch it, and take a bite of the yummy cheese. God, he really wanted a Taco Bell to be nearby.

"SAUCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-UUU-KAAAAAY! COME SLEEP WITH ME!" Double meaning implied.

Sasuke nearly died. Karin was ugly and stupid, she wansnt even eye candy. He liked eye candy. The second word was 'candy'. WAIT! He just remembered Karin had a secret stash of chocolate covered gummy worms under her pillow. SCOREEE!

_Meanwhile…about 10 miles away from the dramatically high area._

"What are we looking for again?" Naruto asked, while walking around a tree for the hundredth time.

"My true love, you stupid douche bag." Kiba said, half asleep, thinking of Sai. Because Sai and Sasuke looked SO VERY ALIKE. Sai was now the Konoha milkman and milkwoman.

Meanwhile Sakura was sitting on a dramatically tall sakura tree. How funny.

"How the hell did you get up there?"

She didn't speak. God, she really wanted some chocolate. WAIT! She remembered Karin had a secret stash of chocolate covered gummy worms under her pillow! WOAH WHAT. THE FUCK. WHO'S KARIN.

She fell off the tree and landed very awkwardly on top of someone's tent. A gray haired harry potter lookalike crawled out of the tent, looking like the girl on the grudge. Sakura screeched and jumped into naruto's arms. Surprised, he threw her and she landed on the tent again. Just not as awkwardly this time.

_Sasuke's campsite 2 hours later._

Ew. Ew. Ew. How the hell did Karin manage to steal my boxers? That's the first thing I saw when I tried to steal from her secret stash. Ohmygod, they were his favorite pair too. Little tomatoes covered in 

chocolate with little cutesy garlands on their heads. He was pissed off and glaring at nothing for no apparent reason.

Suddenly, a blur of hot pink and giraffe passed by. WHAT THE HELL!? WAS THAT NARUTO AND KABUTO TUBING IN THEIR FLOATIES!? Naruto had a coconut drink with a lemon and an umbrella and they were both cackling. Sasuke was so confused. Were they done searching for him? Or did they normally go tubing!? He glared at them, he wanted a snazzy coconut drink. Maybe Karin had a secret stash of those too.

He started walking forward, not really realizing what was happening.

_An hour later, Naruto and Sakura's campsite._

"Naruto, why the hell did you throw the flaming smore at kiba's head!? WHY WERE YOU BURNING THE SMORE YOU DUMBASS!" Everyone knew you only burnt the marshmallows. HE BURNT HER CHOCOLATE TOO! She stared at Kiba who was currently screaming at the top of his lungs while half of him was on fire. Hadn't he ever heard of 'stop, drop, and roll?'

"Hey Sakura, I might be delusional, but is that Sasuke standing there looking all creepy and pedo like? See I told you, you were a pedo target, Sakura-chan!"

_IM A MALE MODEL, BABY!_

_Girl look at me, im so pretty when I got all these hoes all over me. I got them skills. You know the deal. Girl, don't make me show you blue steel. _

"What the hell!?" Sakura asked, looking around the campsite, for the ominous music playing.

"WOAH! I JUST REMEMBERED WHAT WE WERE LOOKING FOR!" Naruto said, dropping his giraffe floatie he was currently trying to blow up for round two of tubing, and staring at Sasuke, who didn't (at the moment) have hoes all over him, but twigs. Close enough.

"Im going to kill you." Sasuke said, all emotional completely dead.

There was a very awkward silence. Kiba was running around, being a flamer (Double meaning implied), Sakura was still trying to make smores still, not realizing her marshmallow was burning. Naruto was just standing there staring at Sasuke and trying to figure out his height and Kabuto was trying to sleep at Sakura's feet in his bathing suit. His head snapped up and his tongue hung out of his mouth, he reminded Sasuke of a dog at the moment. A very ugly dog with glasses.

"Mortals, tell me where is your secret stash of coconut drinks?" Sasuke asked, going very OOC at the moment.

Sakura wanted to kick him in the shin, very, very hard. But she figured burning marshmallows was more fun, she could pretend they were Sasuke's head.

Suddenly rustling could be heard from the bushes Sasuke had emerged from, and all of Team Hawk popped out in a very ungraceful and dramatic manner. They were all wearing their Winnie the Pooh pajamas. Karin thought wearing no pants was more fun, she was stupid.

"What the hell are you doing on _our _property!? " Karin screeched, throwing her glasses at the bonfire, causing her to be blind.

Then out of nowhere, Kiba emerged from the same bushes everyone seemed to be popping out from, screaming more like a girl then anyone, that's when Hell broke loose.

Naruto ran out with is giraffe floatie on his head screaming 'THIS IS SPARTA!' at the top of his lungs, the rest of Team Hawk started running around in circles afraid of the strange boy on fire. The only one who didn't move was Sakura, because Kabuto was currently on top of her, and Karin who couldn't see a thing.

Grabbing a random sword on the ground, Karin swung it around like an axe murderer and chopped off all of Team Hawk's heads, except for Sasuke because she thought he was a duck, and she loved ducks. More then herself. More then life.

Sasuke, stomping his foot very impatiently, glared at everyone and coughed to get everyone's attention. Half of Naruto was in a bush. He reminded Sasuke of a roach at the moment.

"I don't need a goddamn army or team or whatever, I'll destroy Konoha on my own. " Sasuke said, sounding very angsty. Then, he fell to his knees and broke down crying.

He just sat there for minutes bawling on his knees, while everyone looked at him, besides Sakura of course, Kabuto fell asleep on her.

"MY BROTHER'S DEAAAAAAAAAAAAD! " He screeched at the top of his lungs, causing Kabuto to wake up and dive in the fire, killing himself in the process. Sakura stood up angrily, but that look turned into a questioning one once she saw Sasuke. _Her_ Sasuke. The Sasuke that never ever showed any emotion, and now he was crying. She didn't even think that was possible!

"THE WEASELS DEAD! IM GOING TO KILL EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU, RIGHT NOW!" He tried to stand, but tripped over a little drink umbrella, and just fell to the floor and cried some more. So much for killing every single of them right now.

Sakura using this pathetic moment to her advantage, went to grab sasuke's arms and pull him towards the fire, and away from that hideous 'karin' girl, who was staring at a tree at the moment. Her dramatic moment went so much better in her head, but in real life, Sasuke was much heavier then she thought. Using her strength to her advantage, she dragged him over twigs, rocks, boulders, kiba's Barbie heels, random coconut drinks, more drink umbrellas, and so on, and pushed him up in a sitting position, and sat on his lap. She screeched when she saw his face. IT WAS ALL CUT UP AND BLOODY. But he was still beautiful. Uhm, kinda.

"Hey buddy chum chums, what'd I miss?" Kakashi said, coming back from his oh-so-hard mission of retrieving some firewood, which he couldn't find. Even though they were in a frickin' forest.

"OOH SMORES!" He dove for the marshmallows and making himself a smore. Then he proceeded to rip off his clothes suddenly, showing everyone his orange boxers with icha icha paradise book print all over them, and go tubing in the hot pink tube.

Well, life would be allright, Sasuke thought. That's when he passed out on Sakura's shoulder.

THEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE END.

**0909009099\**

**Review.**

**Please**

**Yeahh.**

…**Who has some chocolate? :D**


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